Log In | Register
I recently spent time with, officiated at the funeral and internment of, and conducted afternoon and evening services at the Shiva (condolence call sessions) of a brave person who lost a decade long bought with cancer. Towards the end this good person told me of anger with G-d.
"Why did I have to suffer so? Why me, and not people who actually bring harm and pain to others? I have grandchildren to nurture. I am a retired nurse. I strove all my working days to make better or at least more comfortable the ill. Why would a G-d who is all powerful and compassionate let something like this happen"?
These are all good questions, to which there is no easy answer. Believers have been trying for thousands of years, without any real success to address them. I will not take up your time with noble and ingenious but unsuccessful attempts to grapple with this series of important issues.
A chaplain brings peace. A chaplain brings to those who are culminating their life in this phase of existence a way or ways to exit from this mortal coil dignity, style and grace. Is letting someone die angry with G-d an example of competence for a chaplain?
I listened. If chaplains do anything of value, we listen. G-d gave us two ears and one mouth. There is an implied ratio for usage.
In the decade this good and brave person fought cancer, there was removed a kidney, most of the pelvic bone, and towards the end when all bones metastasized. There were multiple surgeries. All this bought time. There was a price tag for the time. Much pain and suffering accompanied the extra time bought. That was the news. There was good and bad news.
The bad news was the suffering. The good news is that this valiant person lived to see her two daughters and sons marry. I know. I performed the ceremonies. She lived to delight in baby sitting after retirement for her grandchildren. I know. As time allowed, I would pick up her husband, the grandchildren, and her and take them out to various lakes for summer picnics. Children running around parks giggling is the sweetest symphony anyone will ever hear.
During the fall and spring High Holy Days of Rosh Ha Shanah, braking the fast after Yom Kippur, Sukkoth, Simhat Torah. Chanukah, Tu B'Shevat, Purim, Pesach, Shavuoth; and all the other feast times at holidays she had another decade to celebrate them with family, extended family and close friends. Here too I know this. This family were always invited to our home among many others to celebrate these important and meaningful good days.
Medical arts advances gave her an extra ten years. Not pain free ones. Never the less, and not withstanding, another decade to be with family and close people. This seems to have gotten lost in the shuffle. It should not.
There are things in our lives beyond our control. Mortality and morbidity are among them. Birth is a terminal disease. It is a question of what we do with our time here that matters, not how long we have to do it.
As a nurse, this kind and caring person brought comfort, healing and wellness to those who needed it. As a parent, grand parent, friend, community member, and neighbor this person brought nurturing, caring, skill, warmth and leading by example. At the end of this exemplary life, should not it conclude on a high note?
I asked this question. We held hands. There was a smile. There was relaxing. There was peace. Inner peace. Then a final exhalation. Now this gift to humanity goes on to the next level up the great chain of being.
Nesiah tovah. Have a good journey.
Shalom U'vracha. Peace and Blessings. Enoch
